Posts Tagged ‘losers’

Rollin’ 60’s: Nazi meth gang in my neighborhood?

Friday, May 28th, 2010

These tags have been appearing in my neighborhood over the last week or so.  My best guess is that it’s either an Aryan meth gang, or some toothless white kid in a wifebeater who wants everyone to think there’s a Nazi meth gang operating in the ‘hood.  All three are within a city block of one another and would create a nearly straight line when plotted on a map.

Input from grafitti artists and/or experts on Nazi meth gangs would be appreciated.  Note the tag’s design evolution, as well as mixed use of apostrophes and misspelling of “sixties”.

Apparently abandonded house on Union Street, between 22nd and 23rd

Apparently empty house on Union Street, between 22nd and 23rd

Alley wall, connecting Union and Colhoun

Wall in alley connecting Union and Colhoun

Building in Kovacs parking lot on Colhoun, near 22nd

Building in Kovacs parking lot on Colhoun, near 22nd

What makes me think meth?  This:

What makes me think Nazi?  This:

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More idiocy spotted around my dumb town…

Wednesday, April 28th, 2010

I wonder if the one-way sign figures into the message somehow.  Also, I’m intrigued by the use of the term “gayness”, rather than any number of much more insulting homophobic slurs.

If you know any homophobes who hang out near 13th and Edmond, ask around, then let me know if there’s a subtext I’m missing out on.  Although this sort of stop sign vandalism is hardly clever, this particular graffito is damned near polite.  I’m imagining someone’s grandmother standing on a kitchen chair, shaking a can of blue paint.

UPDATE — From the comments:

codemenkey says: “there’s only one way left to stop gayness”?

My reply:

But, if there’s only one way left, what’s it supposed to be? I want to go back and add a [CITATION NEEDED] tag.

Even More Updated:

cory says:

After looking at the style closer, I have to agree that his wasn’t the first sign tagged with this message. It isn’t sloppy and the paint isn’t drippy or stuttered, like it is on the underline, meaning the person knew about can control. Plus, from teenage experience I know that writing with a can is different than handwriting. It takes practice to get a legible word out with spray paint.

My Reply:

You need a Daily Show-style ERIWA commentator title. My first thought was Resident Youthful Indiscretion Expert, but I’m reserving that title for myself. Maybe something involving the phrase “Statue of Limitations”? Naw, I’d better hold onto that one as well.

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Wow, this was dumb.

Wednesday, April 14th, 2010

Via the Glendale News Press by way of Jalopnik:

For an hour and a half, Glendale Police Officer Tom Broadway donned the eye-catching costume during an enforcement sting aimed at educating motorists to yield for pedestrians walking along unmarked crosswalks.

I’m the biggest pedestrian advocate in the world, but this is not how you educate motorists.  This is just, well, stupid.  Local councilman John Drayman summed it up pretty well:

Calling the enforcement sting a “stupid traffic stunt” that was “breathtakingly dangerous,” Drayman said city resources would have been more appropriately used to clamp down on speeding motorists — an issue that prompts daily complaints from the public.

By the way, here’s how to handle traffic with style.

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Topeka = Google, St. Joe = Free Porn

Wednesday, March 3rd, 2010

Everyone’s already all over Topeka’s stunningly retarded decision to call themselves “Google” for a month in a bid to get the search company’s attention and become a test community for its new one-gig fiber broadband rollout.

My buddy over at Keep St. Joe Weird had a couple of suggestions for my dumb town via the Twitter:

keepstjoeweird RT @gregglynnonkjo If Topeka, KS can change their name to “Google, KS” we oughta change our name to Twitter (or free porn)

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Tacklebox kittens — find a tall tree and some rope

Thursday, February 4th, 2010

Via Boing Boing by way of Dangerous Minds, the Daily Mail reports that a Pennsylvania woman has been charged with animal cruelty after installing large-gauge barbell piercings in kittens’ ears and necks, then attempting to sell them online for hefty sums.  She also docked at least one kitten’s tail by suffocating its blood supply with a rubber band.

I dare you to LOL this. And screw you in advance, 4chan.

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Whizzing on the Walmart meat counter

Sunday, January 24th, 2010

Via The Consumerist: A man urinated on a Canton, Ohio Walmart meat counter, ruining $600 worth of steaks.  I’m posting this virtually without comment, other than to say I’m fairly sure this wasn’t any form of coherent protest.  Stop by The People of Walmart to see what I mean.

I’m having trouble visualizing $600 worth of steaks.  In my imagination it’s a guy pissing on a whole cow.

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More McNugget rage

Wednesday, January 6th, 2010

This was once considered dark satire

This was once considered dark satire

A Toledo woman flipped out when a McDonalds night manager refused to sell her McNuggets because it was after 2:30 am and they were serving only breakfast.  The woman punched the employee through the drive-thru window.  The employee grabbed the woman’s hair, then tried to drag her in through the window, presumably to get her assailant on more familiar turf and possibly stuff her into the deep fryer.  The employee was persuaded by fellow employees not to do this, at which point she released her attacker, who in turn unleashed her McNugget-deprived fury on the window itself, breaking it.

This is the second episode of McNugget rage in the last twelve months, the last being in March of 2009 when a woman called 911 three times because she’d ordered McNuggets, paid for McNuggets, then was informed there were no McNuggets to be had and that a refund would not be forthcoming, only a substituted item.  In her own words:

…”this is an emergency, my McNuggets are an emergency.”

At this rate McNuggets will need to be part of the modern crisis/hostage-negotiator’s response kits.  They will have their own little foam-lined compartment, right next to the bullhorn.

Here are two more recent tales of extreme fast food-related stupidity.  They don’t involve McNuggets, but might make you think twice about visiting your local Sonic.

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Possum atrocity

Friday, December 25th, 2009

Via Wonkette.

What is Katherine Harris doing to this terrified marsupial?  I can’t believe I haven’t seen this picture before today.

Is she

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Col. Sanders may not be a muppet, but I’m still suspicious

Friday, December 18th, 2009

Col. Sanders may not be a muppet, but Im still suspicious

That was a surreal conversation.

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Sonic = Meth Lab. This one has an even wider shake selection than usual

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

Dennie L. Bratcher, probably

Dennie L. Bratcher, probably

Okay, this wasn’t St. Joe, but it is Missouri.  Cops in Cape Girardeau busted Sonic employee Dennie L. Bratcher cooking meth in the store after he triggered the burglar alarm.  I love how Sonic attempted to control the damage:

Woodworth emphasized to that Bratcher was a shift manager — not the general manager of the drive-in.

I don’t have much to add to this, other than pointing out that Missouri has two counties competing for the title of “Meth Capital of the World”.

Via Slashfood, by way of The Consumerist.

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